Monday, January 09, 2006

Seven Funeral Sunday

Seven pairs of shoes, pumps, sneakers and the alike, who all specialized in making a snob look a bit snobbier, died on Sunday at their home in Manhattan.

The cause was long walks, cement and overuse, said their loving owner, Snob.

"Each pair of those lovely shoes will be missed", said a close neighbor that lives at Nine West," each one of them had a special place in the hearts and feet of the fashion-forward."

Snob's collection was seven less until recently, when four brand new pairs of stunning shoes were added to her Collection late Monday.

While those shoes can never be replaced, the dearly departed are survived by an overwhelming majority of kitten heels, stilettos, boots, and the casual pair of sneakers.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

One of the best places on earth! well...for a snob, that is...

This Christmas my family decided to spent some time out in a little town of 3000 called Telluride. Telluride is a little slice of heaven located between a circle of mountains. It has everything anyone could ever want and more! My mornings consisted of getting up at 8:30AM...this is only because the time is set back 2 hours so in reality my time was 10:30am. From there I would eat a calm breakfast, call Dial-a-ride, a free car service for the ENTIRE area, to come pick me up and take me to the Peaks, which is an INCREDIBLE spa located at the base of the mountain. Once at the Peaks I would go into the ladies locker room, grab my warming boots and have one of the attendants bring out my skis...oh yes, they have someone to do everything for you there. And to top it all off, THEY'RE NICE! So nice that it took me two days to understand why there was someone always trying to help me take off my coat or get me hot chocolate! Being a New Yorker, I was like, "WHAT! Why are you touching my shit!" hehehe:)

Following all those little steps I would step into my boots and skis and just ski out of the spa onto a perfectly groomed slope. I have to say it was the best thing ever! Following my day of skiing, which included many stops at "beaches" along the way to lie out in the sun, i would softly ski back into the spa and head to the steam room, sauna and pool. Did I mention there was an amazing slide into the pool! SOOOOOO fun!

Besides the incredible skiing, celeb watching (day 1 sat down to try on boots and bumped heads with Tom Cruise who was sitting right next to me getting his fitted as well) (yes, he's short, but has killer smile), eating and drinking on the mountain, the town of Telluride is a fantasy land for anyone who loves cozy bars and fun shopping.

All in all, I have to say Telluride is wonderful and if you can stomach the 8 hours it takes to get there with propjobs and all..DO IT! You'll love every second of it!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Kind of reminds me of a Michael Jackson-type disorder, no?

In a recent girlie get together, a friend mentioned an asinine conversation that she had with a group of her guy friends. Apparently, these guy friends (who are by no stretch of the imagination "catches" themselves, physically or otherwise) told my friend that they would not date a girl/woman who weighed more than 120 pounds.

For now, I will pass on commenting on the absurdity of this restriction. These are the men who will end up alone at 55, having been dumped by the 26-year-olds who ran off with a substantial portion of their earnings after they traded in their wives of 15 years for said 26-year-olds because the wives exceeded their weight requirements after bearing several children. Not interested anyways.

However, a great tidbit came out of this encounter. I relayed the story to a date (who obviously does cavort with females breaking that enormous 120-pound barrier), who responded by saying, "Personally, I question the sexuality and masculinity of a guy who doesn't desire curves, and instead desires a boyish figure."*


*Please note, I mean no disrepect to the short ladies out there, who can in fact be curvy indeed, and still weigh less than 120 pounds. However, myself and a substantial number of my friends run at and even far above the 5'6'' mark.